Numb

I was so sleepy today that I felt numb. I may have even slipped past numbness into something less conscious. Even so, I was able to drive safely to and from one of my bi-weekly Gambler's Anonymous congregations. The meeting was slow in getting started, and the crowd was a little too thin to be hopeful. They say "meetings make it." Whether we anxiously anticipate them or forcefully accept them, we have to go. I could easily see myself thinking that if I don't attend meetings, then I might as well be free to gamble. There is no use in testing ourselves to find out whether or not we can suppress the urge. We cannot. One day at a time, attending every meeting, is the way toward wellness. I'm Gus. I am a compulsive gambler.