Lasting Habits

I went out for a night of bowling with my best friend, who knows all about my problems and my attempt to conquer them one step at a time. First step through the door, I noticed the slots at the near corner of the bar. Thoughts went through my head that proved to me that I still have work to do.

I was having fun, but I had not bowled for a while. "I could adjust and do better next game. Maybe I could hustle the guy on the next lane. I don't have much money. I would have to win and keep winning, but I could do it. What? No way. Have you forgotten who you are? You are a compulsive gambler!"

Then I looked up to see one of the gentlemen that was playing a machine as we arrived. Above him was the lighted ATM sign, and in his hand was a card. The word quarters went through my head. "I have quarters in my pocket. No. I don't want to play, really. Besides, I wouldn't be allowed to play, and I wouldn't get paid."

Like myself and many other friends, co-workers, and acquaintances, the guy wanted more. For whatever reason, he needed more cash. Maybe he lost his drink money or wanted to give more to the machine. Is he a compulsive gambler like me? I thought so.

I used to work at a bowling alley, and I often played the slots. More often than not, I reached for my wallet again and again. If I ran out of cash, I would raid the ATM. If I was not approved, my bank ATM nearby might work. The day's deposit(s) could be accessed after midnight. Then, I would have bent over backwards for gambling money. Now, I've quit gambling, but I will forever be a compulsive gambler.